Balance

Most of my days are spent in a balancing act.  I am usually trying to juggle a million balls at once, merge three different schedules, or am toppling as I teeter on 5 inch heels.  My running feet have necessitated more flats and slipper days than I care to admit so I have had less physical falls lately. However, the constant running to catch up in life has often left me winded and distressed.

Thank GOD for Summer!

The past week has been exactly what this sick mama has needed.  True, I have 4 different part time jobs going on, two kids in two different summer schools, and soccer to coach, however, having the baby daddy around to do drop off and pick up and some of the parenting is just what the doctor ordered!!!

I've been lamenting for the past couple of years that drop off and pick up was killing me and I am pretty sure that I was spot on with my assessment.  Summer school started and teaching 100 kids for four hours with a short 15 minute break has commenced.  Rather than feeling like I am drowning I've felt pretty much okay and as a matter of fact I have had more patience with the kids in the afternoon and evenings.  Now that I am not running around ragged, rushing, yelling, running to get to work on time and kids to school I feel less stressed.  The lack of morning and afternoon drama has done wonders for my attitude!!! I am going to enjoy it while it lasts!!!

This weekend also did wonders for me.  First of all, it was my first with no running race since April and while I miss the high I get from racing it was nice to have one less thing to do.  Unfortunately, I had a horrible time with a horrible parent at soccer on Saturday but getting a rare night out with friends and a couple of Lihing Margaritas put me back in balance.  I rarely get time to converse with adults and never get to eat without having two feed the two little ones or deal with their drama.  So I was thankful to get to get out and feel like someone other than a van mommy for once.

On Sunday I decided to take a break from Marathon Clinic and stayed home.  I got to do my shopping at the Farmer's Market and got to do some cleaning.  Crazy, I know.  Getting to shop at the Farmer's Market is always good for me because it reminds me to eat healthy and lets me get creative in the kitchen.  Since I love to cook and I love to eat it's just one more activity that helps me feel centered.

Being an organizational freak, cleaning always makes me feel renewed and refreshed.  I don't get to clean enough these days and the messes have exploded exponentially so having a few hours to sort, organize, and toss made me feel accomplished and made my living face less dishevelled.  Having an organized living space brings me a lot of peace so it was nice to tackle an aspect of my life that has been out of control for too long!

After getting some work done for my part time job, and doing a few other things I took time to do my run.  Sundays are supposed to be LSDs (long slow distances) and since I've been sick my training has been seriously lacking.  Had I attended Marathon Clinic like baby daddy I would have had to run 10-12 miles.  I knew that there was no way I was going to get it done.  So I told myself that I would need to get 6 miles done.  Normally and easy run for me I was dreading the run.  I had not run 6 miles except for racing and in group runs.  A solo 6 mile run in this heat was daunting.  I lost a lot of confidence and wasn't sure if I had the moxy to pull it off.

So, I put on some cute running clothes, packed my belt with water and fuel and set off to run 6.  I had a course mapped out in my head and hoped I would be able to pull it off.  Any run past 4 miles meant I had hills to tackle and I wasn't sure if my sick tired recovering body could handle it (13.1  miles last week meant nothing because racing adrenaline is like crack and can get one through anything!).  By mile 2 my legs were tired so I started taking GU chomps. I paused at 2 to drink some water and hoped that it would help me.  I turned to climb up the hill and told myself that settling for 4 would be okay.  When I reached hill number 1 I decided to go with the 6 mile route and set off for the next hill.  I told myself after the next hill it was flat and downhill and I would be okay.  I kept going step after step willing my body not to stop.  More GU chomps were tossed into my mouth hoping that all I needed was some energy to keep me going.  At mile 2.9 some random dude stuck his head outta his truck and yelled at me.  I had no idea if he was heckling me or cat calling me but no matter the yell picked up my step and got me going.

I kept with my route and at mile 4 I decided to veer off and onto a course that would let me hit 7 miles.  I ran stronger, looking at my Garmin and realizing that I was at a great stride, 9:30 minute pace.  At mile 6 I decided once again to veer off course and onto one that would take me to 8 miles.

I got home 8.12 miles later in 1:15.  A very strong and solid run for me.  I was feeling balanced and at peace.

Of course...being the type A person that I am I soon felt guilty that I only ran 8 miles and not 12, lol.